Just getting started with Toucan Together, or have some questions? This is the place to start looking for the answers…
Toucan Together is for any couple - married, long-term partnership or dating - that wants to take their relationship to the next level.
You may want your relationship to go from good to great; pick up some life skills to improve certain areas e.g. resolving disagreements, managing money; or you may be looking for support as you deal with a current challenge such as a communication issue, problems with sex or new baby. Toucan Together gives you the tools to work through any issues as a couple, and to grow and strengthen your relationship.
Once you have created your account you’ll need to invite your partner, you’ll be able to add your own words to the email invitation. Your partner will need to click the link to get started and enter the ‘Link Code’ in that email so that you are linked as a couple within Toucan. This will then mean that you can do the couple exercises together. Note that you will not see their exercise answers and they will not see yours.
Feel free to start working through the content on your own, as this might help you describe to your partner what it’s all about. You can invite your partner from the tile on your Dashboard.
If your partner is not sure about Toucan Together, try reassuring them that it is not about finger pointing or psychobabble. It is a tool to help you strengthen your relationship, in a fun way. Tell your partner about your own experience of using Toucan so far and encourage them to try it out for themselves before making up their mind. It is free, he/she can engage with a lot of content on their own to start with and they can always log out at any time.
Sometimes people hold back from trying new things because they have subconscious worries. Some people feel uncomfortable or ill-equipped to talk about relationships so they will need to feel safe. If one partner is demanding or critical then the other is unlikely to want to try it or continue. It’s best not to try and push to get your way. Instead, give a reluctant partner gentle encouragement and then the space they need to “dip their toe in”. Perhaps ask how much time they would like to explore, and then ask gently after they have had the time they need.
As you journey with Toucan Together be aware that: you can’t change other people, you can only change yourself. Even if you think that 75% or even 90% of any issues you face as a couple are down to your partner, go ahead and work on your 25% or 10%!
Toucan Together is very flexible, you can go at your own pace so time interacting with the app is up to you. We suggest a few minutes a day individually, plus time to talk about things maybe once a week in a Couple Time, which will take as long as you like.
For those who want more details… Once you’ve taken your Pulse and created your account you’ll pick a module covering a topic you want to explore. Every module is made up of bite-sized sections; a video (3-7 mins) plus an exercise or quiz (2-3 mins). Each module typically has 10 sections with 2 Couple Times.
Your data is exactly that, yours. Anything you input in the Exercises (both Individual and Couple Time) will be stored under your own user account. Your partner will not be given access to your account (Notes, Bookmarks, Action Points and Individual Exercise answers) and can only see what you chose to show them. They will be able to see how far through the app you are and when you were last active as this is important in progressing to your Couple Times. It is entirely up to you to decide what you show them, especially within your Couple Time discussions. It is suggested that you do each Couple Time using two devices so that you can both see your own data. However if you are sharing a device you can easily use the Switch Accounts feature to toggle between your two accounts (under the MORE icon at the top of the Dashboard).
Do keep your password secure if you do not want each other to have access to the other’s data.
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